by Gabriel Pech
A couple months ago my almost-five-year old, beautiful, blonde-haired, blue-eyed daughter, Mykah, said to me over lunch, “Daddy, I want to be a boy!” This was a critical moment for me as a parent. I wasn’t surprised by her question, nor was I even caught off-guard. But it was still a critical moment. How would you handle this question?
Our culture today would suggest that my wife and I embrace her desire and immediately start calling her “Mike” and referring to her as a him and claim her as our firstborn son. The culture would not only suggest this, but would celebrate us as exemplary parents for embracing our daughter for “who he really is.”
Here’s the thing though… Earlier that morning she was a kitten named “Summer.” And this morning she was a rescue dog named “Everest.” Who my daughter “really is” should not and cannot be determined by what she feels at any given moment. I kid you not, she switches characters throughout the day faster than I can keep up with; and in fact, I spend more time trying to figure out who I am as we play, than actually play.
She’s five–she doesn’t know what she wants. If I let her, she would eat cake for every meal and make herself sick by only drinking chocolate milk.
In this video, one of my favorite superhero actors, Chris Hemsworth (Thor) has a similar interaction with his daughter. How does he handle it? In his words, he tells his daughter, “You can be whatever you want to be.” It gets laughs from the audience but it’s not funny. He is pushing the same worldview that the recent kid movie, Zootopia, pushed: You can be whatever you want to be.
This worldview, while seemingly innocent enough, especially when said to a five-year-old, can have devastating effects, especially in regards to gender.
The big lie that Satan whispered into Eve’s ear in the garden was that God was withholding happiness from her, that He didn’t truly want what’s best for her (Genesis 3). In essence, Satan was saying that the sovereign God of the universe, the One who rules all things, did not actually know what was best for His creation; and that she, a mere finite being, could better determine her fate.
Do you see where I am going with this? That lie back in the garden is the same venomous lie that is being spewed today. The lie that says that somehow God messed up when creating you as male or female, and therefore you can, and should, decide for yourself. It’s the same lie wrapped up in new language and propagated not from a snake, but from the popular media.
So how did I reply to my sweet innocent little girl’s request to be a boy? I tenderly held her face, looked deep into her big blue eyes, and told her that God knew exactly what He was doing when He created her as a girl (Psalm 139:13 anybody?). I told her that living out her life as a girl will bring God great joy and glory, and then I affirmed all that is “girly” in her, showering her with love and affection. I did not rudely dismiss her request but rather told her of a sovereign God who loved her and made her to be a girl that glorifies Him. She smiled big, took a bite, and then told me we were now playing Rapunzel and I was the horse, Max.
As Christians, we must reject the worldview that lies and says, “You can be whatever you want to be,” as if that “whatever” is better than what you were originally designed for. We must teach our children that there is good and sovereign God who knew exactly what He was doing when He created them as a beautiful little girl or handsome little boy.
Gabriel Pech is a member of FCC.